Me...Playing House

Me...Playing House has MOVED!!

2010-02-25T19:56:00.000-08:00

Me...Playing House has moved to its permanent home at Blahggy.com! So head over there! Go!

I've Been Working on the Nur-sery (Part 1)

2010-02-22T17:09:00.000-08:00

And so it is official - the nursery decorating is in progress! The plan is this: my super handy dad is going to install white wainscoting around the lower half of the walls. The upper half will be stripes that are 6" pale pink and 12" a nice, calming green. I know, nothing that hasn't been done before, but I'm excited.

The pink is White Dogwood and the green will be Livable Green, both from Sherwin Williams. You can see a piece of the wainscoting behind the glider. So lovely. For the kind of paint, I just used three of their quart-sized samples, which, apparently is not "real" paint. Did you know that? I was told this fact upon trying to purchase a SECOND quart of the pink sample, which clearly said to the very pregnant Sherwin Williams lady that I was intending to USE said paint for a bigger purpose than merely a sample and caused her to reply, "You know this isn't "paint," right?" And I'm all, "Uh...yeah," because I can smell a lecture coming a mile away and I have already made up my mind, lady. I painted my mini-dining room in my last apartment with sample paint and it turned out just dandy. I explained to her that it was going to be used for small stripes on the top half of the wall in a small room, and that seemed to appease her. How is it NOT paint? Does the color not show up? Seems to me I don't need a black-light or a lamp to hold my walls over in order for the paint to show up. I'm sure there are many folks out there gripping their desktops in an effort to keep from banging your heads over and over at my sheer stupidity, but, as far as I can tell, the sample paint is indeed paint. And why would I need anything else? It's done in a satin finish and it's only $4.99 per quart. Just grand for me! This is a nursery, people. I'm not entertaining the Pope in here.

So Excited!

2010-02-17T20:18:00.000-08:00

Headed back to Los Angeles tomorrow, after having been gone for a year and eight months, to see family and friends for my first baby shower! I'm so excited to see everyone - and REALLY excited for baby gifts and my cake!

Had a checkup today and had to do that glucose test. That stuff they have you drink...egh...definitely got a little vomit feeling right after downing it. I'll hear about the results in the next day or two. Other than that, my tummy is measuring just fine, I have gained 16 lbs. since becoming pregnant and I got to hear her little, super strong heartbeat! OH! And I handed in my pre-registration paperwork! For when I go into labor! So crazy. Can't believe I'm getting to that point. We go back in 3 weeks when I'll be 28 weeks along and then we start going every two weeks. Although the day-to-day drag can seem slow, in the big picture, it's going pretty fast. It's fun.

High Maintenence Alien Baby

2010-02-11T07:56:00.000-08:00

I am now fully expecting and very afraid of my impending high maintenance alien baby. Out of boredom from reading about my pregnancy week to week - as so little seems to happen at this point that each new week just talks about something that happened in the first trimester. i.e. "Week 23! How exciting! You know, back in week 7, the lungs were forming! You want to know about week 23? Oh...uh...did we mention week 9! Whoa, at lot happened then!" - I have taken to doing some reading in Your Baby's First Year: Week by Week.

I haven't read more than the first 48-hours. And it really makes sense that there is also a show with the same name that has dramatic music and discusses topics that make us think that we could be swindled by our electric company, have our identity stolen by a very-well technologically connected guy in Portugal and be warned by a ghost that a mystery man will murder us ALL IN ONE DAY because THIS IS HOW FRIGHTENING THE FIRST 48 HOURS ARE FOR THE BABY. Or, at least for me.

Do you KNOW, have you READ, do you have ANY IDEA how much like an alien your kid can look like upon entry into this oxygen-breathing world? Especially when delivered vaginally? It's insane.

First off, the kid's head will render him/her a perfect candidate for the Saturday Night Live recurring sketch "The Coneheads" if they were to ever bring that back. Second, it COULD look like your child wanted to play a practical joke on you by pulling a stocking over his/her head to flatten out the ears and nose - except, as far as I know, there are no stockings in the uterus. Or Scotch tape. She could also have any one of a number of birthmarks ranging from looking like a little freckle to like full on papaya has been stapled to her head. Gone are the days of what fruit your baby looks like, now it's what fruit is on her head.

At the risk of scaring the shit of those of you who have yet to read about all this (oh, and there's more, let me tell you) and out of courtesy to all those moms who have already given birth to PERFECT babies where none of this has happened, I shall conclude my list. But know this! it's not over after those first two days, oh no. There's cradle cap and possible six months of crusty eyes due to blocked tear ducts and jaundice. Oy. And I am praying to God and sending out positive affirmations to the Universe that my child NOT be a preemie. As much as I want to meet her, I can wait.

Now, am I frightened by all of this? Well, I guess "frightened" wouldn't be the BEST word, but as I was reading last night I had to put down the book and look enviously at my husband who was NOT reading about all of these things but instead enjoying a nice Vanity Fair article about John Hughes and announce, "Whoa. There's A LOT." And then he pointed out that there are millions of parents and they all get through it and we're a pretty good team and we'll get through it, too. Good point.

And I know that these books are like the end of pharmaceutical commercials where they have to name every funky thing could ever possibly in a million billion years happen, but it's still a little overwhelming. Last night, I definitely felt overwhelmed. And, honestly, slightly trapped. I know these are all "normal," I'm not worried. There's a change a' coming. And it's going to be huge. And I'm sure there will be thousands of times I will feel that I can't handle it and that I have no clue what I'm doing. And that's okay. We'll be okay. I don't even think I'll be the crazy mamma lady who calls the doc all the time, either. I'm pretty steady. I think, like all of us, I just want a healthy baby. And, knowing that there are SO MANY things that ARE healthy and normal but that LOOK so weird is what's overwhelming. I feel like I've got to memorize them all so I can recognize the "normal" things. But I guess I can just look in my book. Or call friends with kids. Or call the doctor. Or call my folks.

In the end, I think we'll all be ok. And we'll be creating some great memories in the process.

My Growing Bottom

2010-02-10T11:02:00.000-08:00

Yes, my bottom is growing. And not just my butt. My thighs, too. I bought maternity jeans a while ago that were too big. And then they fit really well. And now...they're a little too tight. It's very frustrating. In my daily email from What to Expect the subject line was "Weight Worries," and I was all, "Oh, God, yes. That's me." And I opened it up to see that I should be repeating a mantra: I am not fat, I am growing a baby. I am not fat, I am growing a baby.... Very nice of them to share this. And I get it. And I do like the mantra. But, when you've spent good money on maternity jeans, it's REALLY HARD to consider going BACK to the maternity store to get BIGGER MATERNITY jeans. Seriously.

No, I'm not going to diet. But it's not like the thought doesn't cross my mind. Although, I don't think I could even if I wanted to. Dieting is lame. What I need is a FOOD LIFESTYLE ADJUSTMENT. A FLA, if you will. Which kind of just looks like an abbreviation for Florida and makes me think of the sun and the beach, which makes me think of BATHING SUITS and how not good I would look in one right now.

I need to eat leaner meats, more salads and not so many carbs. And I'm sure those Girl Scout cookies aren't helping. I just laid out the basic "yes, I NKOW" of anyone gaining weight or already over weight. Lovely. But, you know what? I'm not a big fan of chicken. And salads, as a meal, don't really do it for me. Maybe I should just believe my husband when he lovingly tells me I'm beautiful and go back to the mantra...I am not fat, I am growing a baby.

But my butt is fat.

Baby Got Boo-TAY!

2010-01-19T09:47:00.001-08:00

I would like to thank the maternity clothing-making world for making shirts that cover the pregnancy ass. Because, seriously, my booty could absolutely be featured in a remake of "Baby Got Back." And it's really fun when your co-workers start noticing. So, thank you to all those who make maternity shirts. Seriously.

Update by Photos

2010-01-08T06:06:00.000-08:00

Yes, well, there's no point in apologizing yet again for waiting so long between posts. It's lame. And I keep wanting to do updates and then something else comes up. It's been quite a while since my last chat of baby and my life, so, needless to say, a lot has happened. For lack of a better (or in order to avoid something more overwhelming) way to get it all down, I think I'll go by photos.

For Christmas, I got the camera that I have practically been BEGGING for. A nice, digital, Canon Rebel. I used to do headshots and such when I was in Los Angeles and I had a top notch FILM Canon then. I have been jonesing for a wonderful digital Canon so that I could use my old lenses. And, I got it. It makes me happy. Although, my main subjects are my dog and my husband and my husband gets pretty fussy. So, I am not want for photos of Sampson. I think my favorite one of him so far is one I took today.

Today was also our first snowfall! So fun. Being that this is the South and NOT anywhere that's very used to snow, the whole place gets all, "WINTER STORM WATCH: 2010" for a whopping 1 inch of snow. But, it means a snow day! Most of the counties in Middle Tennessee announced last night that they would be closing school for today. It hadn't even started snowing. And it wouldn't for about another 12 hours. I love it.

If you look hard enough, you can see the snow in the air. Like I said, not a ton of snow, but enough to make it so that my hard-working husband and myself could take the day and watch back-to-back episodes of The Sopranos! During which I would periodically make him pause the DVD because I could feel our little baby kicking - and then I'd call him over (because we're lame-o old folks with separate recliners; eventually we'll get a nice couch) and have him place his hand on my belly. And, without fail, our little one would stop kicking and punching only to leave my hubby huffing that he had to get out of his comfy chair for nothing.

I'm 19 weeks along, but have been feeling her (oh, yes, I forgot to post about finding out the sex. We found out on December 16th when we went to a 3D imaging place) since week 16. I love that I started feeling her so early. Apparently, week 16 is one of the earliest weeks to start feeling kicks. They say it can feel like gas or cramps. It was actually the same night that we found out it's a girl. I had tons of gas (which, as any pregnant lady will tell you, is annoyingly normal) and figured that the steady pushes near my bellybutton were just bubbles. But then I felt it again the next night. Same place. And the next night. So I asked this lovely lady I work with, Jennifer, who has five children and is thus an expert at all things growing baby, if I'm indeed feeling my little gal. And she says yes. The main difference between the two is that gas is bubbly and moves around the baby gives a steady push!

Oh, and aside from the fact that Jennifer is simply lovely as she is, she made me a gift. A baby gift. And we've only been working together for about a month. She made me this diaper cake:

I wanted a diaper cake like an alcoholic wants some whiskey. I wanted it that bad. It's a quintessential baby shower gift. Granted, this wasn't for my baby shower, it was for, well, just being pregnant and finding out I was having a girl. Which makes her super awesome. I don't know if any of my friends or family even KNEW what a diaper cake was, let alone had plans to make me one. There are 100 newborn diapers on it along with little pink ornaments for our Christmas tree next year and little pink lollipops, which will apparently be a necessity in the delivery room. Yay.

Husband Quote of the Day

2009-11-11T07:13:00.000-08:00

My husband makes me laugh. Especially when it comes to things he says about or to the baby in my belly. Today he comes into my office and says, "I can't believe we're growing a new person. I've never even made a snowman." Luckily, I'm a snowman-making veteran and I'm the one making the person.

I Peed Out My Baby

2009-11-10T07:18:00.000-08:00

Last night I realized that I had a gyno visit on Wednesday so I better do some tree trimming, as it were, which I do on the toilet. So, I trim. And then I pee. And, somewhere between trimming and peeing and probably because baby brain can make you a little loopy, I forgot that I trimmed. And I glance down, see a patch of trimmings floating around, and for the briefest of moments, my brain goes, "Oh my God! I've peed out my baby!" True story.

Overdueness & The People Who Work for My Gyno Think I'm Crazy

2009-10-31T15:24:00.000-07:00

I'm so overdue on blogging about what it is (for me) to be pregnant for the first time, I should be flogged. But I'd probably pass out as the first lash was headed my way, falling down with just enough time to hear the whoosh of the leather flogging whippy thing over my head. Because that's how tired I am. No one tells you how tired you can get. I emailed a friend of mine (a long overdue reply due to the fact that I couldn't walk to my computer without falling asleep) and in the email I wrote, "When your body is making a person, you get tired." She said I should make that saying into a t-shirt. I probably should. But I need a nap first. If I see that shirt out there, I want my cut. I'll take it in blankets and pillows, thank you.

So, my plan is to catch up on all the baby-building goodness that's happened since I found out I was pregnant on September 23rd.

Here are the main things that I need to write about:
1. Finding out - CHECK
2. Calling the gyno - that's what this one is
3. Telling the parents
4. Telling the in-laws
5. First gyno visit
6. The baby toys that my husband decided to get ALREADY and WITHOUT ME
7. Second gyno visit

Dear God. That's a lot. Best get started.

CALLING the GYNO. aka THE PEOPLE WHO WORK FOR MY GYNO THINK I'M CRAZY
I got my first positive pregnancy test a little after 7:30am. Once Tom went to work, I looked up my gyno's phone number and called, thinking there's no way in the world they will open before, oh, 2pm, because I just had a feeling I was going to have to wait forever to do this first of many rite of passage tasks that I'm sure most pregnant women love to do. The recording said they opened at, pleasant shocker, 8:30am! I had about 20 minutes to occupy myself.

What the hell was I going to do? It's too early to call any of my friends in Los Angeles. I'm sure they'd be excited, but not at 6am - it's not 6am-worthy. Can't call the folks as I was planning to drive over there in a little bit. I called one of my friends here, but she didn't answer. Some friend. Didn't she KNOW I had THINGS, very IMPORTANT THINGS to tell her?! Ah!

OK, I'll walk my dog. And, you know, for fun and all, I'll take my cell phone in case I'm still walking him as 8:30 hits. NOT that I'd call RIGHT at 8:30. That's lame. And a little desperate. And I do NOT want to be pregnant AND desperate.

Phone clock turns 8:28, 8:29, 8:30...wait for it...8:31! Time to make a call. 8:31 is not lame. Plus, for all I know the clocks at the doc's (yes, I rhymed on purpose) is fast and I'll call and they'll look at their clock and go, "Oh! It's 8:35. This girl probably just casually picked up the phone to call us, not having any clue when we opened. What a patient and relaxed person."

Here's the best part. Would you like to know what I say to the woman when she answers the phone? I say, "I peed on a stick and it said I'm pregnant. Now what?" I PLANNED to say that. I did. Isn't that awful? And the woman, says, "What?" Did I really expect a different response? But, because it was in my plan, planted in my brain and my brain isn't functioning properly ever since I saw two lines on my First Response stick, I REPEAT it. And the woman, probably realizing she isn't going to get anything more intelligent out of me says, "So, you're pregnant." And I say, "Yeah," in a slightly ashamed manner. So, not starting off so well, but it gets worse.

She asks me the first day of my last period. Now, as many of you know, this is the standard way to figure out how far along you are until you get to do an ultrasound and measure the little peanut. Unless you are a super nerd like me and you have been charting your cycles and you know when you ovulated so you knew when to plan "the deed" and you know, with pretty damn good accuracy, about when conception occurred, you just listen to what the nice lady has to say and shut your mouth. Also if you're charting, you'll know if your cycles (the one where you got pregnant in particular) was long or short, thus affecting the timeline. And, it always helps, too, if you're a bit of a know it all. And what makes this even more exciting is that I'm all of the above, and unfortunately, I didn't have ALL the information I need. Let me 'asplain.

So the woman on the other end of the line who is just doing her job pauses (presumably to fiddle with some device that will tell her when I got pregnant) and announces, "So you're 5 weeks pregnant." And I knew the person I spoke with would probably be a little off considering my cycle this go round was 39 days and not the expected 28, but this seemed way off. So I say, "No, I'm 13 days pregnant." And she's like, "Huh?" And I explain that I've been charting and I know when I ovulated and I'm 13 days pregnant! And she tries to tell me that I'm 5 weeks again and I launch into my spiel again, assuming that most people do not CHART, but that she MUST have heard of charting and somewhere I must be getting through. Nope. All I get is a very condescending, we're-just-going-to-give-you-these-little-blue-pills kind of voice from her and it says, "Well, let's make an appointment for next week anyway." So, defeated, I make my appointment. Not that I was hugely irritated because I heard most people don't get in to see their doctors until much later.

But, what makes my argument WORSE is something that NO ONE TELLS NON-PREGNANT PEOPLE! The two weeks BEFORE conception COUNT toward your PREGNANCY WEEKS! No one told me that! Had I know that, I would have AT LEAST be wise enough to say that I was FOUR WEEKS pregnant and not 13 DAYS. And then I wouldn't have been SO crazy.

The Results are In! (Part One)

2009-10-05T07:56:00.000-07:00

And they look like THIS:

And then an hour later THIS:

And then the next morning...like this!

And, yes, honestly, there was a fourth one. I took it a few days later just for fun. Okay, not totally just for fun. I woke up with a lower temperature than expected and it worried me so I went and got another pack of 2 tests. So, yes, there is still one left sitting under my sink that I could take just to show the progression to FIVE First Response Tests, or I could let my husband take it, which would definitely be just for fun. Unless it said positive. And then I'd be rich.

ANYWAY, back to being...PREGNANT! What??!! Yes! Pregnant! Preggo! Preggers! Bun in the oven, etc. etc.!

Last Tuesday night (September 22nd) I went to bed knowing that I'd be taking the test in the morning and that, if I were pregnant, this would be the one to show it. I woke up because my husband was making too much noise. I figured I'd take it after he left so I could just have the moment to myself - whatever that moment was to hold. But, after seeing my eyes open, my husband comes over, gets super close to my face and goes, "Can you pee on a stick?" And I was all, "Well, it'll be today if any!" And he's like, "Do it! Do it!"

So, I get out of bed in my oversized t-shirt and my just-starting-to-grow-out bangs are sticking up nicely and I grab the test and pad into the bathroom. As I open it, my heart starts to beat a little quicker. I pee where I'm supposed to for the amount of time I'm supposed to, put the cap back on and watch. First, as was with the other two tests I took before, the one line shows up.

And then another pink line starts fading into view.

And my heart starts RACING. And I can't blink.

I put the test on a stack of still-packaged toilet paper that's sitting in front of me while thinking to myself, "Tom's just on the other side of this door. They say to wait at least three minutes. Let me just put this down here and wait another minute or two."

The line gets darker.

All I can focus on are those two lines. And that the test looks VERY different from when I took it a few days ago. And OH MY GOD I THINK I'M PREGNANT. Holy shit. We did it. Whoa. Really?

And I start to shake. It's time to get up, (wipe first), and tell Tom. And by "tell" I mean "show" because I didn't do much talking when I walked out of that bathroom.

Tom was facing the other way in the closet. He heard me come out, turned around, saw my face and says, "Are you?" Apparently, my face said it all, but he initially thought I was joking. Until I held up the test to show him, which I'm slighty surprised he saw clearly considering my hand was shaking like a wet dog in winter. And out of my mouth comes, "I'm shaking. But I'm also hungry." Like it's somehow NOT okay to be on the verge of passing out after seeing your very first positive pregnancy test.

His eyes get wide, his hand files to his mouth and he says, "Oh baby, you're pregnant." And he kisses me. And, really, I'm way to shocked for kissing. Nothing has sunk in. It's just shock. Forget about hugging and jumping around and all those mental pictures we have of people who want a baby and finally get the news that their bundle of joy is on the way. That wasn't me at that moment. And he's got a hand on his hip and a hand over his mouth and he keeps going, "We're going to have a baby." And leaning in for kisses. He's shocked, too, mind you. It's a pretty wild feeling. And I did want food.

So, being that I'm the information nerd that I am, one of the first things I do is grab my Taking Charge of Your Fertility book and my charts and I look up how to figure out the due date! Take the date of my thermal shift, add 9 months and subract 7 days and you get...June 4th!

Tom had to leave for work about 15 minutes later. Next up was to call the gyno and tell my folks.

Ashamed Sampson

2009-09-16T07:40:00.000-07:00

The look I get: Liza, I'm sorry I went in your bag! I thought I smelled food!

(Oh, and have I MENTIONED that we don't have NEARLY the furniture that this house requires?)

Preggers?

2009-09-14T12:43:00.000-07:00

If I'm pregnant, I'm 4 days along. If I'm pregnant. I've been charting, using the Fertility Awareness Method (FAM), which is AMAZING and I am SHOCKED, SHOCKED at how few people know about this and how it's not taught anywhere. Unbelievable.

Anyway, if I did everything right last month, it looks like I ovulated. Which is good. Especially considering I went off the pill about 2 months ago. I know it can take a long time to regulate, but I'm on a timeline, people. The Husband and I want to get a bun in the oven this month or next.

So, I've been charting. And I think I did things right so I was fairly certain when I was fertile and about to ovulate this month. And we did the deed on appropriate days. Which, quite frankly, is HILARIOUS. Having sex when it just comes naturally vs. having sex when you're going, "Fertile fluid! Let's go! Don't care how sleepy you are or how awesome I look in my oversized t-shirt from 1990 with my hair doing that fancy post-face-washing thing it does IT'S. BABY. MAKING. TIME."

I've had four days of high temperatures. Typically, you'll have 12-16 days before it drops again and you get your period. If you hit 18 days of high, welcome the baby in your belly.

I'm at four. And The Husband can't stand waiting. He keeps going, "Pee on a stick." If I'm headed out to do errands, he goes, "Pick up some pee sticks." I keep telling him that the EARLIEST I'd be able to tell isn't until the end of this week (Thank you, First Response!). And that's the earliest. I secretly keep wanting to take a pregnancy test just to see, but I know that's lame and it'd be about 10 wasted dollars. And we just got a house so I have plans for that 10 dollars.

Our New House!

2009-09-05T08:43:00.001-07:00

Well, I guess TECHNICALLY it's not "our" new house being that we're a lease-to-own, but it WILL be ours soon! (keeping fingers crossed) We moved in on August 21st - one week after my hernia surgery. Well planned is what THAT was! "Sorry, hernia surgery lady here. No can move." "That box? Oooohhhh, I so wish I could help, but, you know, hernia surgery and all."

That's not to say that moving day wasn't a nightmare because it was. A messy, sweaty, icky nightmare. The movers were three hours late. THREE. I should have picked another moving company when I had to change the move date and the guy didn't call me back or pick up the phone until I called him FROM ANOTHER NUMBER. Probably should have taken that as a sign. But, I didn't.

So, they were three hours late. We had called three other moving companies going, "Do you have someone NOW? Because our lives are packed in boxes. Oh, and I just had hernia surgery." One company said they could have people there by the afternoon, so we held that spot. It was The Husband, my mom and myself (and Sampson). At first, it was just my mom and me. The movers were scheduled to get there about 45 minutes before TH would be home.

Sampson was super freaked all day, what with all the packing and moving his personal stuff around. And then all the waiting. When TH got home, we waited some more. Then we called the moving guy who kept telling us that his guys were AT U-HAUL RENTING the truck. They were RENTING? Don't most moving companies have their OWN trucks? Great. This was going to be great.

After the third time he told us that they were "5 minutes away" my husband called to tell him nevermind. We were going with another company. The guy got all apologetic (as he should have) and said how important our business was to him, meow, meow, meow.

So, we said we'd go with him. FINALLY the movers show up. At 1:30. They were supposed to be there at 10:30. At least they were there, though, right?

I had to head down to the house because the cable guy was showing up at 3 or 4. (Shockingly, they only gave me a 2 hour window! And the guy was on time!) So, I'm in the new house. With nothing except some Mickey D's I picked up and my blankets. My mom took Sampson home with her until it was time for everyone to move. Once the cable guy came, I had some TV to watch, so that was good.

I hadn't heard anything by 5pm, so I call my mom. No word. 6pm I call again. She's back at our old apartment and she tells me that one of the moving guys HAS TO BE AT SCHOOL by 6pm so they are waiting on a replacement. I was in shock. Mainly that we had NO CLUE that this was the situation. Lovely. I'm all alone and in mild pain and I'm certain TH is ready to lose it at any moment.

FINALLY, at around 7pm, I hear from my mom who tells me to go get pizza and beer, that the new guy showed up and they are headed down.

We finish the moving day around 9:45. A night. It's dark outside. Our front door has been open for hours and it's bugs galore inside the foyer. But...we're in. Ahh.

And so begins the adventures of our first home.

Kroger Marketplace: A Little Piece of Heaven

2009-08-30T07:43:00.001-07:00

We moved into our new home last weekend and I have been checking out the local grocery stores. We've got a Kroger on the left and a Publix on the right. The Publix has a special side road that leads us right to it, while to get to the Kroger, you have to wait an awfully long time to try to turn left - it's enough time to get mad enough to curse at at least 13 people in their cars. For these reasons, I figured Publix would be my main choice.

Enter: Kroger Marketplace

I was driving home one day last week and knew we needed a few groceries. Since the Kroger was on the way home BEFORE the turn off to our street, I figured I'd stop there. When I walked in, I'm pretty sure angels sang. Either that or the KM had a small children's choir in the back, which wouldn't surprise me. Yes. That's how great it is. It's massive. There are two rows of aisles with all. kinds. of. stuff. I love stuff. I don't OWN a ton of "stuff," but it's nice to sit there and peruse and imagine all these things in my home.

I took the long way to get the asparagus. Well, I didn't really KNOW the short way being that I'd never been in there before. I grabbed a few groceries, all the while looking up at each aisle sign mentally noting the things I'd like to visit on my next KM vacation. Finally a nice Kroger employee startled me out of my FURNITURE EXPLORATION TRANCE (because the KM carries furniture) asking me if I needed anything, when I snapped to and said, "Oh, yes, can you tell me where to find pie crusts? I know, I'm not in the right area at all."

After locating said crusts, I came across the bakery section. The Husband had a great day at work so I figured I'd get a little cake or something as a congrats. While I'm in there, I start to notice various black stands that have containers at the top, each housing some delectable treat. Most were bread pieces, but the one nearest me had...yes...SNICKERDOODLES. I started to get excited. I saw a lady behind the counter who's excitement level seemed to be the polar opposite of mine and decreased in proportion as mine went up, but I had to ask.

ME: Excuse me?

Happy Lady: (grunt)

ME: (pointing to said snickerdoodles) Um...are these for sale or for tasting?

Happy Lady: Our kiddie cookies?

OOOOHHHHH. So they were for KIDS who were either being very good or a pain in the ass. And she clearly wanted me to be aware of this. Well, this lady doesn't KNOW ME and MY COOKIE LOVE HABIT and that I didn't give a DAMN if they were for starving Somalian children, if it was at all possible for me to have a cookie I. WOULD. HAVE. A. COOKIE.

ME: Uh, yeah, I guess.

Happy Lady: Yeah, those are samples.

ME: (so excited) So, I can have one?

Happy Lady: Yup.

ME: Oh! You just made my day!

Happy Lady: (grunts as she goes back to work)

So, I had my snickerdoodle, which, in all honesty, wasn't the BEST I've ever had, but seriously I'm not going to complain because I was walking through the best grocery store ever eating a cookie. Awesome.

I grab a few more things and decide to head over to the pharmacy for some pre-natal vitamins. (Not preggers yet, but the gyno said to get on the vities now.) So, I start the 3 mile hike to the pharmacy section. As I'm headed over there, I'm finishing up the last of my snickerdoodle. But, no fear! Because out of nowhere pops the Starbucks fairy (yes, there is a Starbucks in the KM) with, YES, mini frappuccinos with a mound of whipped cream on the top. And she has a tray of them and she asks me if I want one and I'm all, "Lady, you REALLY don't need to ask," but I just say, "Oh yes. Thank you!" And it's delicious. And I grab a pharmacy lady, sip on my frappuccino and we look for a good pre-natal together. I feel wonderful. (I know, my verb tense is all over the board here. Leave me alone.)

And then I go into the HOME DECOR section. That's right. The KM has home decor. I walked up and down every decor aisle. It was too fun. And I bought a candle. And it's just great.

My new bumper sticker will say (and I'm sure KM can make this for me): I Heart KM.

Too Plastic?

2009-08-08T10:29:00.001-07:00

Photo courtesy of yahoo.com home page

The Real Adam Lambert? Or an Adam Lambert action figure/Barbie doll?

The Pill & I Broke Up - 1

2009-07-27T19:49:00.000-07:00

It's true. Last Sunday when I was a'sposta start my next cycle of baby-stoppers, I looked at my empty case and thought, "Ha! I'm done with you and you don't even know." And then I laughed slightly maniacally. Bring on the baby making!

Well, not...yet. I still have to have my hernia surgery. My doctor found my hernia, which made me feel acknowledged. When I first went to see him, it went into hiding. It's like when your cable is out and your Internet is all wonky and you call the cable guy and they tell you they'll be there after they visit the moon and then they finally show up and your cable is working so well it's curing cancer. That's how I felt when I first went to my doctor. This freakin' hernia has been around since I was 14. Seriously. I used to have to squat in the hall sometimes walking from class to class to help the pain. But it's been the past year that it's really been a regular issue.

So, yes, he couldn't find it. And tried to make me feel better by saying that he usually can't feel them at first for about 50% of women. I guess our hernias are shy. So, when I knew I was going back to see him, I stood up all day, pushed like I was trying to poo a ton of bricks and kept jumping up and down in my little dr.'s office wrap while waiting. And, there it was. All my hernia hard work paid off. Of course, I left the doctor's limping.

My thought was that I should get this thing taken care of before a big ol' baby sits on it. Apparently, though, when you get preggers, your body responds by holding UP the uterus as opposed to the uterus pushing DOWN on things. Interesting, eh?

As you may know, The Husband and I are planning to TTC soon. Right after surgery. Which is why I went off the pill. I know it can take a while to your body to get back into baby-having-readiness. And, me being me, I have a PLAN. The plan is: 1. go off the pill now 2. get preggers in September 3.have a baby in June. And that's it! I like simple plans.

But there's a little more to it. A friend of a friend, upon hearing TH and I were wandering into baby-having-territory, practically threatened my life if I didn't read Taking Control of Your Fertility. And, me being me, I looked it up on Amazon that night, (I think the most amount of reviews I've ever seen for a book on Amazon is maybe 40. This book has over 1200. And over 1000 are 5 star. Ok, I'll bite.) and went to Borders to get it two days later.

***must continue this later! Super tired! VERY interesting stuff, what this book is teaching!***

Wait Until March??!!!

2009-07-24T08:47:00.000-07:00

I LOVE Alice in Wonderland. I love Alice Through the Looking Glass even more. I collect different editions of these books (pop-up books, annotated, various illustrations), have been to the museum in London that houses Lewis Carroll's original drawings and writings of these books and have a framed poster hung directly above my computer of one of the pages of his first edition called, Alice's Adventures Under Ground. My husband, the first time we celebrated my birthday together, found a bed & breakfast in Santa Barbara (we were living in Los Angeles at the time) themed after Alice in Wonderland called The Cheshire Cat Inn and took me there for the weekend. It's also where he proposed 10 months later in October 2007.

* * *

Just in writing the above and looking at my framed poster, I have been wanting to get a custom mat made for it for quite some time. The frame is great, but it's not quite the right size for the poster so the borders are all wonky. I guess you could say it's something I've been mildly tolerating for a while.

So, I called Michael's and Fast Frame and told myself if it was less than $30 I'd bring it in today. Fast Frame said she could cut it while I waited if they have the color I want in stock! I'll be heading over there shortly.

Another reason I love this poster so much is because it goes well with my coaching. Many people who come to me for coaching are searching for direction. They need a change. In this particular page of AAUG she is at the beginning of her journey and is very lost and confused and the world around her is changing rapidly. I think it's just perfect.

* * *

Back to waiting until March of 2010. This, as you may have guessed, is when Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland comes out. I can't wait. Well, I guess I have to. I was looking at some of the photos on Coming Soon and they are AWESOME. Really. How amazing does this scene look?

photo courtesy of Coming Soon

Then, I found a little trailer on YouTube, which doesn't give much considering how far away the release is, but it's just enough to be highly intriguing. Plus, it's got Johnny Depp - one of the best characters of our time (duh).

I need to re-read these before the movie. Although, it looks like the movie takes a very literal and twisted take on one of the lines from the book, "We're all mad here," by the Cheshire Cat. And that excites me even more.

I don't collect a lot of things and I'm not a crazy follower of various books or movies or TV shows, but I am ALL. OVER. THIS.

Busy, Busy, Busy...

2009-07-16T13:26:00.000-07:00

I don't have time to write this post. I really don't. I got home from the "day job" all of 45 minutes ago, took Sampson out, made some Ramen (I didn't even have time to eat properly), checked emails while I slurped on noodles and thought to myself, "I REALLY want to do a post. What the hell do I want to do a post about?" What I want to do a post about is my totally sassy new photo to the left and the amazing and hilarious Mandy Whitley who took them two weeks ago. But I want to do that post justice. I want samples and to talk about our shoot and her and my new favorite joke. But I don't have time. I have to get in the shower. Scratch that. I have to pack first. I have a 6:55am flight to Idaho with a stopover in Vegas for my cousin's wedding. After I pack, I have to shower. I have to leave here in, oh, 65 minutes because I finally got my super exciting bridal workshop off the ground and am working with three fabulous women and it's tonight! So, I really don't have time to write this post. I must make haste and away to packing.

Newlyweds?

2009-07-05T07:52:00.001-07:00

Since I'm also a bridal coach and run my bridal coach blog, I was read the blog Misadventures of a Newlywed. As The Husband came to see why I wasn't cooking our weekly Sunday pancakes, he noticed the title and said:

TH: Are we still newlyweds?

me: I don't know. When does it stop?

TH: I think two years.

me: Then, yes.

I say it's as long as you feel like newlyweds, right?

That Lame-O "Long Time, Super Busy" Post / Jewelry!

2009-07-03T06:20:00.000-07:00

I totally didn't want to have one of those, "I'm sorry I haven't written in so long, I've just been so busy," posts, but here I am having it. Not that I have a lot of followers at this point so it's not like I'm disappointing to people. Just to myself (big heavy sigh).

Oh, well! Here I am now!

So, (I use the word "so" a lot - don't judge) Wednesday night, July 1st was my husband's and my 3rd year dating anniversary. I think my parents find it slightly ridiculous that we celebrate this and make a big deal about it, especially since we now have a wedding anniversary. I just chalk it up to a generational thing. And I think most of our generation is all about celebrating themselves! I will take pretty much any opportunity to celebrate, and really....TO GET GIFTS! I like gifts. Especially good ones.

Our wedding anniversary was April 27th, but we were pretty damn broke at the time, so we didn't do much more than dinner. The Husband is a big fan of photo albums, so I made one of our honeymoon and gave him that. I had plans to also have one for our wedding (as would be most appropriate) and one for our first year together as a married couple, but, as life can do, time and money became major downers.

ANYWAYS, we figured that we'd celebrate our 3 glorious years. TH said he'd wanted to do something for me on our wedding anniversary, but that he couldn't afford it. SO, fast forward to a whopping 2-ish months later where my husband is ROCKING (it needed the "G" at the end and not just an apostrophe cuz that's how much he's ROCKING) at his new job. This makes him happy. And, I ain't gonna lie, I like it, too.

TH has talked for a long time about his desire to buy me jewelry (No, I am not making this up. He also does all the grocery shopping. Jealous?) He has bought me two bracelets before, but has referred to them as "crap" - I'm guessing his definition of crap is directly related to the amount of money he spent on them and his personal judgement on what that amount of money means (Oh, Lord, the Coach in me is coming out!). OK, you get it.

So, I figured I was getting some sort of bedazzled piece of something to wear. When I came home from work I asked him if he wanted HIS gifts (which was our wedding album I FINALLY finished using the awesome free-downloadable software from Blurb). And he was all, "You got me a gift? (which he already knew I did) Cuz I didn't get you one.... Uh oh, am I in trouble?"

He's a pretty crappy liar when it comes to getting me things. He thought I had NO CLUE when he was going to propose and I knew so much so that I grabbed one of my best girlfriends and we went and got manicures and I got an eyebrow wax. One should always have freshly groomed eyebrows when being asked to become a wife.

So, I just pretended not to care and don't go any further into the lame-0 lie of why he didn't get me anything. I changed and off we went to this adorable little Italian place by us. We got wine and calamari and yummy dinner.

When we finish eating and we're waiting for the table to be cleared, TH pipes up with:

"You know how I always want to get you jewelry?"

ME: Yeah.

TH: Well, I got you some!

ME: (with great mock surprise) REALLY??

TH: Yeah! Here it is!

And he pulls a little black box out with this lovely piece inside:

The middle stone is Blue Topaz, my birthstone. I think it's a perfect piece of jewelry for our one year wedding/three year dating anniversary. I love the wave. It makes me think of going with the flow. Turns out, TH went to about six jewelry places before deciding on this one! For a long time, I wasn't a huge fan of my birthstone. After we got back from the restaurant, I looked up what it meant. I found that "topaz" comes from a Sanskrit word meaning "fire" and that this gem was thought to cool boiling pots - or hot tempers. And, in our relationship, this fits well. Not that my husband has a hot temper, but he can get worked up over things more quickly than I can and I like to believe I help cool him off.

All in all, a great anniversary. I love that my husband wants to buy me jewelry. Not just because jewelry is fun, but because it shows he thinks about me, cares about me and wants to provide the best in life for me.

Coming up soon...the POSSIBLE NEW HOUSE!

My Favorite Part About Last Night

2009-06-11T07:26:00.000-07:00

3:22am - me, sleeping soundly

3:23am - The Husband and his big legs (he's got these crazy, hard as a rock, all-muscle thighs and calves) come flopping over right on top of me.

me: (start doing a swimming kick with my legs in efforts to get The Husband to roll over)

TH: (waking slowly) oh, you're so annoying!

me: ME? YOU'RE all on my side!

TH: (rolling over) Butthole.

me: Inside of a butthole.

TH: Sh. Butthole.

me: Inside of a butthole. Sh.

TH: I'll fart on you.

me: Doesn't matter I'm immune.

TH: I'll still do it.

me: I've built up antibodies.

TH: (very softly and quickly) Sh.

me: (practically at the same time in the same way) Sh.

Cut to: 4:12am - the husband is sleeping soundly, me, not so much

Cut to: 4:53am - I've got lame restless leg stuff happening (I know, sounds so super stupid to people who have never had it happen, but it's crazy annoying), so I go to the couch in the living room.

Cut to: 5:22am - Pretty sure I've just finally fell asleep.

Cut to: 5:33am - Three minutes after The Husband's alarm went off and he comes out to ask me what happened.

5:36am - Back in bed and it's all to myself.

Introducing...Sampson!

2009-06-09T10:13:00.000-07:00

Name: Sampson (given to him by someone other than us, but we think it fits)

Breed: Mutt, some kind of Daschund/Terrier/Awesome mix

Favorite Hobbies: Sleeping, Barking at all things noisy (big trucks, the UPS truck, the FedEx truck, motorcycles, the guys who mow the grass in our apartment complex - he gets very angry at these people. I thought barking at this stuff was just what cartoon dogs did), Sleeping in our bed, Sleeping on his bed (which is a small couch in our bedroom), Sleeping on one of the two chairs in our office that provide a nice view of the street and other dogs enjoying freedom and sunshine while he is being held captive inside, Asking us if we're going to finish our dinner

Birthday: No clue. We got him from Happy Tales on June 14, 2008, so that's his birthday. One day a few months ago he was all depressed and sulky and I think it's because that was really his birthday and we didn't do anything special. The people at Happy Tales told us he's probably 5 years old and our vet agrees.

Made Out Of: Love

Fainting, Crying, Barfing and Babies

2009-06-04T13:38:00.000-07:00

My husband is SO ready for a baby. Before we met, I think he was looking for someone to be a mother to his unborn children first and a wife second. He's been talking about babies and how he'll have tea parties with a daughter and play sports with a son (although, he has stated he will certainly invite the son to tea and the daughter to baseball). I told him I'd go off the pill for his 33rd birthday, which is in November, two weeks before I turn 30, 1 year and 7 months after our wedding and 3 years and 4.5 months after our first date.

He's been talking about it more and more lately as it gets closer. One of the things we're waiting on is that I'm pretty sure I have a hernia and need to get it operated on before a baby sits on it for nine months - probably not very comfortable. I say I'm pretty sure because I've never had it professionally checked out due to the fact that I haven't always had the best insurance (but I have HAD insurance for a number of years) and didn't want it to be a pre-existing condition. That can really screw you. So, now my husband has moved into full-on hunter/gatherer mode and has a good job with good insurance. It's off to the surgeon at the end of this month.

Once that's taken care of, I'm assuming, it's open TTC season. (TTC is a phrase I was unfamiliar with until today when I, out of curiosity, went to thebump.com - the same people who brought the world theknot.com and the nest.com. I gotta say, I love the consistency of the names. So, I went to the the "Trying To Conceive" section - even though we are not yet TTC - and saw all these posts talking about "TTC" and, sadly, it took a few minutes to click.

I've also been thinking that waiting until November to December to go into full TTC mode (I pretty much need to use TTC now whenever possible being that I am a STBTTC - Soon To Be Trying to Conceive.) might not be what I want. The deal is that my husband's birthday is in November and then there's Thanksgiving and then there's my birthday in early December and then Christmas and New Year's. Let's say I don't C (yes, Conceive) until about 2 or 3 months after I stop my baby-stoppers. That puts the kid being born right around all the other birthdays and holidays. That's a little too much for me. It's also why I chose to get married in April. I'm a big fan of celebration. I'd like to spread it around a bit.

So, my thought is that if we start TTC around September or October (provided said hernia is all patched up) and it takes 2 or 3 months to C, I've got a kid somewhere between August and October, which is cool. And, if I C super-speedy like some tell me happens, I've got a summer baby. I've always felt bad for summer babies, though. Those are the kids who had to share the "birthday day" in school. Although, I asked my hairdresser today (who I totally trust) and she's a July baby and she LOVES it. So, that settled my worries.

Anyway, I'm getting way off track. Well, not really. I'm just worried that this post'll be too crazy long.

Like I said, my husband, Tom, talks about babies every day. He wanted to talk about baby names the other night. We, like many couples, have had this conversation before. We last settled on Eleana for a girl (his grandmother's name) and Canio for a boy (my grandfather's name - but my parents are opposed to it). So, I was out with my mom today and we were in this shopping center that has this awesome new-but-super-low-priced bookstore. I thought, hey, why don't I go in and get a baby name book for my baby-obsessed hubby. I went in and asked for the baby name book section.

When I got there and looked at the books, I a little bit wanted to faint. Then, I a little bit wanted to throw up. And, I kind of wanted to cry. It was a reaction that would probably scare Tom. Luckily, being a life and transition coach, I know it's normal. Right? Totally normal. But, when my mom came over, it didn't keep me from repeating, "It's so weird to be in this section. It's so weird to be in this section." My mom, who, although she went off the pill on purpose, was very NOT ready to C and have a kid and isn't as ready as my pops to be a grandparent, promptly left the section, grabbed, yes, The Idiots Guide to the Mafia, and started looking through there for baby names. You know, since my grandfather was Italian and we like his name.

Well, I looked through a few and found one I liked. It was only $6.75 so, sure. Plus, I kind of feel like starting now and easing into things will be totally beneficial. While in the car, I looked through it a little and came across the girl's name Zali, which my mom and I agreed was cute. A little while later I was driving and thinking about it and it came to mind that Zali is a rearrangement of the letters in my first name, Liza. No, I couldn't do that to the kid. Or me. Or Tom. Unless of course we named our son Mot. But then we would be oddly narcissistic. I could spell it Zalea, though. That solved it.

I brought the book home and wrapped it for Tom. When he first opened it, he gripped that it was more a gift for me. And he promptly sat and started going through each of the 100,000+ names. He loves it. He read me some names while we both had beers and I cooked dinner. It was fun. I didn't want to barf so much. Or faint. Or cry. But at least I've got a few more months until TTC. I'll stick to STBTTC for the moment.